The war on inadequacy

img_3854My inspiration for this blog comes from reading through some old messages between myself and my ex-boyfriend.

While reading through them I realised how self-destructive and negative we were toward one another. How many words of death we spoke over ourselves and one another. It broke my heart. What broke my heart even more was the fact that we were supposed to be caring for one another and having eachother’s best interest at heart.

A portion of this problem came from the fact that we didn’t spend enough time building up a solid friendship before we started dating. The majority of the problem was that Christ was not at the centre of our relationship. We were not calling out the gold in one another, giving constructive criticism or even making much meaningful conversation. We did not respect one another or trust one another. There were no basic fundamentals to our relationship. Obviously things weren’t going to work out right from the start.

As Christians, we are meant to mirror Christ and to affirm His qualities in those we build community with. By building our relationship on lies and hurt we were diminishing and insulting our identities in Christ. We were tarnishing His image and dragging His name through the mud because we were “supposedly” loving and caring for one another.

He was insulting my identity in Christ by claiming to cherish me and pursue me with a Christ-like heart and I was doing the same to him by belittling him as a man and disrespecting him.

The Bible so clearly tells us to love one another and to pursue intentional relationship. Romans 12:9-10 (MSG) – “Love from the center of who you are; don’t fake it. Run for dear life from evil; hold on for dear life to good. Be good friends who love deeply; practice playing second fiddle.”

1 Peter 2:17 – “Show proper respect to everyone, love the family of believers, fear God, honor the emperor.”

This is meant to be an encouragement to set a standard for the way you should be treated as a child of God and to treat others as children of God.

It is meant to be a wake up call if you are currently being treated as less than what you’re worth and it’s meant to cheer those on who are being intentional in their pursuit.

I love sharing these experiences and look forward to sharing more.

If you would like me to write on something specific please comment below.

K

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